Wednesday, 13 June 2012

Justifying Cheating

I would like to start off by thanking all the sweeties who supported me through my last blog post. You guys rock. Yes, it is hard to admit when you cheat, considering I haven’t done something like this before. I went out of control. It was great to see that I am not the only one who has had a binge-fest happen to me. I’m bad, I know I have a problem, let’s move on and see if we can prevent this from happening again, shall we?

Because it’s true, I didn’t gain any satisfaction from my actions. I don’t feel better now, or like I subdued future cravings. In fact, I feel like absolute shit about the entire weekend. I feel not only disappointed in my lack of willpower and like I took several steps back in terms of my bodybuilding training, but I feel the cravings on FULL FORCE, and now I have to use 3x the willpower to deny them. Just awful.

Nothing positive came out of my binge, in fact, I didn’t find ANY of what I ate super-incredibly-tasty. I didn’t miss any food enough to sit here now and think, well man, I really needed that Chinese food. Nope. I didn’t. Now what got me to cheat like I did in the first place, and then to spiral out of control?

Justifying my actions to myself.

I used every excuse I could think of to push me towards cheating.
  • I have been doing so well with my diet lately, I deserve this.
  • I have been working out so hard lately, I deserve a break.
  • My personal trainer told me not to miss out on any moments because of the dieting, my Dukan Anniversary is a moment to celebrate, so I should go out and cheat.
  • Every other bodybuilder has a cheat meal a week, I haven’t been so I can cheat now and it equals out one cheat meal a week.
  • I will get back to it twice as hard when I’m done cheating.
  • I will workout twice tomorrow to make it ok that I’m not working out today.
  • Carbs are energy and fill out your muscles, so cheating is good for my muscle growth.
  • I have been missing nutrients in certain foods because of the diet so this is supercharging me with nutrients.
  • This is shocking my system and making it so any efforts I put in the future will be doubled. Making it so my body doesn’t get used to my training and my efforts get stagnant.
  • I wont have another of these until November… ok September, so this is okay.
  • I have already cheated this much already, so a few more cheats wont do any more harm than is already done.
  • I should allow myself to indulge.
  • My training focus should be on working out, not diet, doesn’t matter what I eat, the muscle growth I have made wont diminish because of cheating.
  • People eat like this all the time.
  • All the calories I ate will just promote muscle growth.
  • I wont feel guilty tomorrow, I will get right back to it and just forget this weekend.
  • No regretting these decisions, I own them and I wont feel badly.
So you see, all these things made it ok in my mind to have my giant-binge eating weekend. But guess what, I am too embarrassed to tell my personal trainer, I am too embarrassed to tell anyone really. I want to get my emotions off my chest but I feel like I failed myself.

Especially since before I even had that first bite of sushi I told myself it would be so easy to just forget about cheating, go home and make a delicious meal. Better on my wallet, and I would be more successful to myself, I would not regret going home and making pork tenderloin as a treat… I should have listened to myself while I was being rational.

So STOP! You! Yes you! The one justifying to herself that tomorrow you will just work harder, that tomorrow you wont remember cheating, that you want this now or whatever you are saying to rationalise to yourself that what you are about to do is ok…

You will never regret going to the gym.

You will never regret not cheating.

You will never sit at home with your Dukan-friendly meal thinking to yourself, man, if I had bought that chocolate bar and chomped it down in the car on my way here… I would be feeling so much better about myself.

So there is no need to cheat, no need to binge (You never think before the binge that it will turn into a binge…) no need to justify it to yourself because deep down you know it’s a mistake and the wrong decision.

Be strong you guys!

Also, as a side-note. It is so difficult not cheating right now… I keep seeing ice cream in the freezer, I smell doughnuts, baegals, my tummy is just craving them. Damn carbs, being so addictive.

Seriously I mean it though, NO CHEATING UNTIL SEPTEMBER (for my birthday) Come on now, I can do it! I don’t want to feel this shitty again! Gotta be strong.

It’s so hard though. : (

Make good choices!



  1. Most of the people who are giving you cheating advice are not carb addicts, so their advice can't really apply. Cheating may be a pork chop instead of a pork loin for you. So what? Now you know, and IF you "cheat", do it the DUKAN cheat way, just a little fattier, fruit or such.

  2. Thanks for this. I have been falling off the wagon pretty badly lately (I'm in the midst of a 6 week plateau) and I really need to get back on track.

  3. I've sooooo been there and done that. It's amazing the excuses our brains can come up with FOR cheating! But it's behind you now. You got back onto your diet the next day and that's important.

    I'm one of those people who is really really good or VERY bad. I just can't be that in-between person who can eat one cookie or one piece of choc. If I cheat, I CHEAT!!!!!! Therefore I try not to let it happen much if at all.

    Shed those guilty feelings. Look at how far you've come. You're amazing!

  4. Whilst I can appreciate your guilt and horror, I don't understand the craving and all out junk fest you have admitted to.

    Like Veerukka says, I have no advice to offer simply because I haven't been craving any particular foods enough to actually go and buy them, nor have I "cheated" yet...

    All I can say though is that there is no point i holding onto the negative feelings about the stuff up. You know what you are like, so either add small things in that you aren't going overboard - if you can do that - or just come to terms with the fact you can't celebrate in the old ways anymore and find fun new ways to celebrate. There are some fantastic desserts and foods that are dukan friendly and you need to change your mindset now to celebrating with dukan foods :)

    Hugs DD...but let go of the guilt now, it does you no good and will only weight you down

  5. As far as your "excuses" go, the one that really resonates with me is "I have already cheated this much already, so a few more cheats wont do any more harm than is already done." .... and I think that is the most harmful one, which leads back down the road to where we were. If we can let go of that thinking once and for all (I personally haven't been able yet), then the occasional "cheat" won't lead into all-out binges anymore - in my opinion and knowing myself.

  6. It is good to make this list, you said that you would be going over the entire scene to see if you were able to determine what happened. Great minds have to work like that. We are here to support you, I know that for a fact. You are vaild and worthy and notable. Sending you big ol' HUGS!!!

  7. Mamma in Maine14 June 2012 at 07:39

    You can do it, you know you can!
    Your reasons NOT cheating are exactly true. I do keep reminding myself to push past what few cravings (actually I have very few-- more of what I 'want' I want out of habit-- seeing the chips at work, I 'want', but don't really crave) and the next day I usually forget about it-- and when I do remember, I remind myself "hey, I'm not "craving" that now-- I'm really glad I didn't have any".
    Keep going. Keep doing it.

    And tell your trainer-- they will understand, and you'll get a boatload of guilt off your shoulders for keeping it "secret". Who knows-- he might be an ally and keep reminding you NOT to do it again :)

  8. So while I'm not doing the Dukan Diet, but another one I still feel like this really hit me.

    My problem is that I start craving sugar and I'm not satisfying it. I want a mcflurry, or DQ, or icecaps... but I just keep driving home and I don't let myself stop to get them but then I sit at home wishing I had stopped and it's all I can think about for the rest of the night. It's crazy!

    I'm still being good but to some extent, how the heck do you get it all off your mind?!

    You're crazy strong girl! Keep it up :)

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  18. hahaha, but the truth is, the more I cheat, the more I lost my willpower to seriously dieting